Preacher and Lonely Wife Update

Oh man, this is too fun and too easy.  This preacher guy, like most male humans, struggles with lust.  My VP in Hollywood continues to work on that and has done a fine job in my prideful opinion.  I taught him everything he knows.

This poor lonely wife has no idea that Preacher has struggled on and off with porn/lust for much of his life.  And of course, he and his wife aren’t intimate as often as he wants to be.  Check this out.  I love to brag, but I almost can’t because it is so easy and scientific.

Here is the last couple of months of this preacher’s life as I have helped him out.  Starting two months before his counseling session with Lonely Wife (although I have been working on him for years):

  • Two months prior:  His last time to view pornography.  Felt guilty, prayed about it (oh brother), but didn’t confess to wife or friends.
  • 6 weeks prior:  I started a marvelous series of events, one of which I can’t take credit for, his wife’s menstrual cycle.  LOL!
  • 5 weeks prior:  the wife got the flu, no nookie for preacherboy.  HA!
  • 4 weeks prior: they had family visit, crowded house, lots of stress, no sex.
  • 3 weeks prior: this week was super busy, lots of hurting and whiny people, lots of church activities, he had the flu on top of this all, and even he didn’t want sex.  Too tired and too sick.  Easy.
  • 2 weeks prior: still no sex, or no porn, but he needed some “relief” of his “sexual tension” if you know what I mean.  Too bad God didn’t create males with shorter arms.  ROFLOL!
  • 1 week prior: no flu, no busy schedule, but he and wifey had a fight over money, or something.  I really think both were just cranky because they had not been intimate in around two months.  Tempers flared.  Angry words spoken (YES!), and still no sex.
  • This past week, his wife’s latest Victoria Secret catalogue arrived!!  Gotta love the USPS, right on time, when I need them to be.  LOL!

Another thing I have planned for months finally came to fruition.  He emailed her today.  He did it when he got home from church.  He avoided her in person but sent a long and encouraging email. He talked about how much he is concerned about her and is praying for her.  And guess what.  He used his secondary email account that he honestly created just for junk mail and signing up for stuff on the internet.

I planted the seed in his head that he should use that email, so he could continue to encourage the lonely wife privately.  Of course, he didn’t want someone to accidentally break confidentiality by reading the church or his regular email.

I got him!  Oh, I got him.  This is going to be sooo easy.

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